Friday I baby sat for the lovely Annemarie, who was out with work mates. K and I took Jed and Rebecca to the cinema to watch "Revenge of the slighgjsotijothhhhhh" it was very much a boys film and the only really good thing I can say about it was "it tied up most of the loose ends".
It didn't have any ewoks in it at all and Jabba was only present for a few moments - Yes okay it was technically clever and the fight scenes with the light sabers were quite beautifully done but somewhere in the scripting the "love" we felt for the likes of Luke and Hans (ohhh especially Hans) was lost and I kinda wanted Neil Lisam (Sp - apologies) to die!!
I guess the whole movie can be summed up by Jed and Rebeccas scoring the film.
ME - " if ten is the best and one the worst, what score would you give it?"
Rebecca - "minus 10"
Jed "six hundred and seventy thousand"
Boys Flick and sith happens!!!
Off to surprise Bev
Last week whilst talking to my oldest school friends husband, Simon, we two hatched a plan to surprise Bev at a BBQ she was organising for work colleagues and friends. Saturday morning I packed our bag and hearded K out of bed - we had places to be, people to surprise and BBQ to eat!
However whilst unpacking my work bag it suddenly dawned on me that I had forgotten to print off the email Simon had sent me with directions to their house. Not to be outdone by my own stupidity I located our address book from under a pile of filing and looked up directions on the "tinternet".
Cool - directions for Crook Key Cottages in Cockerham were found, feeling smug the car was packed and we headed off towards the hills I know and love called Cumbria. My brother, Shaun, had previously mentioned a short cut route which K decided we should try out - the A686. It may have knocked off a couple of miles but boy was it wiggly woggly - Top speed 40mph, worst 3mph. The views were spectacular as we crested the highest point but as we finally got onto the M6, thanking our lucky stars for the Romans, we decided to go home M6/A69.
Another hour on the road and we saw signs for Cockerham and Garstang - nearly there.
An hour later and we were still driving round Cockerham cause the "destructions" just took us into the village not to the door - "Stupid Shannon". Being male and the driver K didn't want to stop and ask for help/instructions so we drove for a bit more. After banging on the door of the local police station and getting no answer we decided to call Simon. Bev answered the phone, I umhmmed and ahred and pretended I needed to speak to Simon about car problems (Simon is great with cars) but Bev said he was BBQing - still not ready to give up the ruse I asked Bev to get Si to call me. (She didnt - CAAAW!!!)
We drove around some more and found a Crook Key Hall - hey desperate people do strange things - so we drove up and down the lane and did some trespassing, but we couldn't spot the numerous cars I knew Simon and Bev had so knew we were in the wrong place.
We drove back out of Cockerham and then back into Cockerham, we drove down every road we could, expecting to site BBQ smoke, it was about this point that we began to snipe at each other, but before we could get into full flow there, in a garden digging weeds, was a silver haired angel.
I told K to pull over the car and did the thing only women seem able to do. "Scuse me" said I, small yippy dogs barking at me, "could you tell me how to get to Crook Key Cottages please".
The small woman looked confused and then slightly disturbed "No sorry, I've never heard of it".
"Owww" I mewled *shake of the head, eyes rolling* "I'm supposed to be a surprise for a friends BBQ and we are totally lost, I don't suppose you know them do you - Bev and Simon"? My silver haired angesl face split into a grin and she said "Yes, of course I know them, but they've moved"
DOH!
"Oh, not a problem I know exactly where they have gone to I used to live quite close by". Beautiful, beautiful woman!!! Directions obtained and back in the car we headed off to surprise Bev.
You should have seen her face, it went through the whole gamult of emotions - confusion, shock, pleasure, she finally ending up berating us for not telling her we were coming - how we smiled and hugged!
Simon is never one to be outdone and is no different when it comes to organinsing a space for a BBQ. He has his own big yellow bus with "party equipment". It actually belongs to the people he does rallying with but I like to think of it as his!
Behind this mammoth tent construction is Simon's big yellow bus - it comes with several fridges filled with wine and beer. Hmmm my very own dream come true.
Wine glass filled and introductions made, and promptly forgotten, we all got down to the drinking and eating stuff.
Keefe, Trish, Stefan (I think) His girlfriend - I was never introduced to her but she was very
pretty and had great eyeshadow. Bev - with beer in hand,
Marcus, his wife and Daughter Mara (maybe) in front.
(Told you I was crap with the introduction stuff)
All in all a most fantastic afternoon, children were present but kept under control, the afternoon passed into evening and the wine flowed almost as well as the converasation.
I met two very interesting guys Steve (Future PM) and Andy ( Spin Doctor) who were setting out their manifesto for their own parliamentary party. Of course I had to get in on this - however because of the flowing wine I'm a bit uncertain about most of the policies.
I met two very interesting guys Steve (Future PM) and Andy ( Spin Doctor) who were setting out their manifesto for their own parliamentary party. Of course I had to get in on this - however because of the flowing wine I'm a bit uncertain about most of the policies.
I did get myself promoted to Chief Whip (lash), Simon's brother Alexander was designated Yf (Youth) representative and Trish - Simons mum - was the over 50's rep I think. Ms Rasberry - Bev had apparently offered to solve any sexual problems within the party, but not sure how exactly!
Things I can remember:
- Wales was going to be sunk - there was a very good argument for doing this but other than its full of Welsh folks and big hills I cant remember what it was.
- All sheep will be given scuba gear (just because we are sinking Wales we don't want to loose the sheep)
- Everyone will be directed to live life to the full with copious useage of drugs, alcohol or sex (preference is down to the individual - usage of all three will be heartlily encouraged).
- Cigars will be smoked by everyone.
- There will be no written words. The groups guru - Mr Savant - will be the parties representative when anyone has questions *shhh - Im actually Mr Savant*
- There was something about everyone over 55 having to join the army/forces, but Im not quite sure how that fit in with point 3.
- PM's main role was to figure out the real meaning of life - none of us were happy with Adam Duglas's "42".
The rest of the night was just a blur of filled wine glasses and chat - I wanted to do the washing up, but Bev wouldn't let me, I ground my teeth, smoked a cigar and got lost going to the toilet sometime during the early hours of the morning.
Sunday slipped by with causal bankholiday verve - we did various things including sitting in the sun, eating some of the best ice cream I have ever tasted, visiting several tourist spots, feeding Gulliver - Bev's horse and helping Simon take down the tent and clear out the bus. I also got to see a four day old mare - who had the longest legs, biggest eyes and cutest hairy chin!
But I have to say one of the weekends highlights was Simon letting me drive his bus. We had moved the bus onto private ground to ready it for parking when Simon hopped out of his seat and said "go on then". I had a brief flash back of the magistrate saying "if you drive within this six month period, you will be prosecuted, sent to prison and forced to share a cell with a woman called Bruce who wants to call you Bubba".
Before I could stop myself I was sat in the seat and going round in circles - My grin was HUGE!!! Sorry I just couldn't miss this opportunity - I wanna be a bus driver!!!!
This picture does no justice to this magnificent beast.
In the evening we filled our faces with left over BBQ Stuff - that Beverly woman can sure produce a stomach busting meal from nothing! Then we amused ourselves with a few more beers and the viewing of "Underworld" on Simons TESCO brought DVD!!! - Tee hee, sorry, but he was so embarrassed about it being from Tesco's I just had to mention it!
Not sure if you have seen this "vampirique/Weirdwoolf" offering but Simon called it "Underpants" not sure why - could be the tight fitting leather everyone wears (its a Simon thing) but I think his pet name actually summed up the film - I liked the end!!!
K and I shared a leisurely breakfast with Simon and Lynn (the lovely lodger/house sharer), Bev was at work - mad woman - its Bank Holiday Monday!!!
At about 11.15 we set off home. The journey over to Cumbria took just over 4hrs - scenic view, the journey home just over 2 and a half hrs - Hmmm know which route we will be using next time. Got in, did the washing, cooked soup and made turnip and carrot spread (yummy). K watched TV and I finished the Terry Pratchet book "Going Postal" I had "borrowed".
All in all a bally wonderful weekend and huge thanks to Simon, Bev and Lynn for their hospitality!
