I got in Friday night and cracked open the ubiquitous bottle of wine. I sipped the first glass "moosing" over the week and pondering my desire to have my mawanker leave my personal space for a while or at least until I feel Im able to deal with his constant criticisms in a more rational way than calling him a mawanker behind his back.
I tidied up the trailer - cause that's what I do when Im feeling low. 45 mins later all dusted, sparkling and windows cleaned, the Hoover panting and full I refilled up my glass and stared at the sea.
A sunset passed before my eyes and 2 hours later his lordship entered our domain surveying the space he forgot to notice how tidy it was - typical man! I of course took umbridge at his inability to notice I had worked hard to maintain our standard of living and we grunt talked to each other, filling in the blanks with "hmms" and "uhhus".
We drunk the evening away occasionally commenting on the dull and un-captivating programs the TV folks have deemed to fill our Friday nights with. I totally think the programming is worth the licence fee we pay - Ohh forgot, don’t pay, cause I live in a trailer!!!
A new game for the cats and me
Because we still have not been able to track down the man "who does" we still have not got a cat flap. The girls therefore have taken to climbing out the window, waiting ten minutes then scratching furiously at the back door to be let in, this game is only played by me and the cats, cause K with his finely tuned male hearing is unable to hear the frantic scratchings, mewlings and bells jingling - I believe it has something to do with him being an hunter rather than a gatherer... HUH!!!
The down side to this creative fun game is they have also decided we should play it at 1.30am, 2.30am, 3.30am and 4.30am as I am the only one who knows the rules I am the one who leaves my warm bed on the hour almost every hour to let them in and out. Why do I do this - Because Im scared if I dont they will get eaten by foxes, beaten up by rabbits or chased unjustly by wild dogs - now tell me please "WHO IS THE FOOL?".
Morning session at Work
Saturday morning I had to work so cycled in, it was my first cycle where I haven’t had to wear my gloves and hat - could this be summer lifting up her skirts to flash her ankles at us?
I had two lovely ladies in: one of whom is practicing typing - and is now up to 7 words a minute (read it and weep - 7 words a minute) and the other who has a state of the art Dell lap top (I WANT IT) but is unable work on it because she doesn’t know where the files keep saving themselves.
We had a long discussion and I tried to explain the intricacies of default folders and a little folder called "my documents". We talked about the saving process and how we laughed when she said she didn’t realise she had to actually click on the save icon or "File/save as"... she thought it just did it automatically. Problem of the Missing files solved.
Plumbing problems
The rest of the day was spent sweet talking Willie and Dave - two guys who fix the plumbing at the trailer park -and supplying them with copious amounts of Coffee. Our pipes have been leaking all over the ground to the rear of the trailer and the marsh land was beginning to become a problem. I was contemplating putting up danger signs just in case stray children or animals attempted to cross and were never seen again - but figured neither children or animals would read the signs so it would just be wasted effort.
Willie and Dave scratched their heads an hummed and arrhhed in the usual "maintenance" way, they called in two other friends who also joined in the universal "hmmming" - a spade, some grunting and a few hours later the problem was fixed with some of those cool little tie things! Technology - who needs it?!?!
Amature Dramatics at its worst
I had promised a fellow thespian friend I would go and see him in his latest show "Masquerade". A whole 30 mins before I was due at the theatre I ran round the trailer flinging on clothes and putting on make-up. Couldn’t find my tinted moisturiser so ended up with the real stuff - icky, icky, icky!
For those who don’t know Masquerade its a Terry Pratchet book and he collaborated with some other folks to produce the play. The guy generally has me in tears of laughter when Im reading his books, but whether its because I’ve already formed my own impression of the characters in my own "minds eye" or the cast were just as wooden as Rincewinds luggage but the play itself was pretty diabolical.
Steven was one of the highlights with a fantastic camp theatre manager and a rather understated troll - I didnt hang round at the end and walked home, ignoring the cold and enjoying the moonlight on the sea, trying out phrases like "it was interesting - was it the director or the lead who decided they should stare out at the audience like a rabbit in headlights every time they forgot a line"... or .. "didn’t that corpse - sorry old guy, do well to remember to get on stage?"
Im still trying to put together an honest critique without too much sniggering, Hx, when you came to see my plays remind me of the "lovey lies" you pacified me with!
I entered our wee haven and discovered my very own Prince charming snoring on the sofa, with Bill Bailey finishing his latest tour on TV. I turned off the tv - sorry Bill - filled up my wine glass and showered. K managed to sleep through all the banging and removing of make-up.
Then I read till my eyes felt heavy - I played noddy dog with my book - you know the game, you keep trying to read but your head keeps swaying forward and you hit yourself in the face with the book and it wakes you up. Hours of fun!
At 2.30ish I contemplated getting up and covering Prince Snoring with a spare duvet, but the duvet on the bed wrapped itself round my body and I was unable to move. The cats had also got bored of their in/out game and had positioned themselves strategically on either side of my prone body, literally locking me onto the matress.
I’m pretty certain K came to bed about 4ish cause I have a vague recollection of cold hands and snuffling at my neck but by this time I was deep in the world of slumber, snoring softly and mumbling "yes, it was an interesting portrayal - I liked the ending".
Lost confused and looking for Inspiration - Stage 2
Monday, March 21, 2005 at 10:15 am
Where went the weekend?
Hx said...
Use lots of big words ! *air kisses* And why not keep the cats in? save you having to let them back in, just a suggestion. I left Lotty out all day yesterday, she has access to the lean2, by the time I got home the whole street knew, the noise as she sat on the fence screaming at me "where have YOU been?"
~
Hx said...
~
Hx said...
right that's it, I'm gonna stop checking every hour on the hour to see if you've blogged . . . . *storm off in strop, arms folded*
~
said...
Nice site!
[url=http://wtalijty.com/rpbr/vojo.html]My homepage[/url] | [url=http://mwpkaocp.com/kzyl/jzqt.html]Cool site[/url]
~
said...
Great work!
My homepage | Please visit
~
said...
Great work!
http://wtalijty.com/rpbr/vojo.html | http://oeepfqdm.com/gkty/idjk.html
~